Friday, January 13, 2012

24 sucks...

I don't know how many 24 year-olds out there feel this way, but I certainly would not say that 24 is my best year...AND IT JUST STARTED!!! Sorry to be a debbie-downer, but for some reason I am just having a hard time with being 24.

I've never been one of those girls who don't want to reveal their age; I just assume that as long as I look young (and who are we kidding, I probably always will), why does my age matter? So needless to say, I've never cared about the whole "one-year-older" thing. I've never been scared for a birthday - until January 7, 2012. I was dreading this birthday after I had a realization a few months ago that 24 was "old". I kept trying to just push it out of my head, telling myself that I am still SOOO young...blah blah blah. But nothing helped. And now, here we are, 6 days after I turned the dreaded 24 - and I have become one of "those" women.

Don't get me wrong - this birthday was probably one of my favorite birthdays! My parents flew up from Utah and surprised me with a weekend visit. Andy was in on it and tricked me into thinking he had to go help a friend on Friday night, when in all reality he was picking up my parents from the airport. There I was, sitting on the couch in my garments watching yet another episode of One Tree Hill, killing the time until Andy got home so we could go eat...and I heard a knock on my door. I figured it was Andy just teasing me or something, but you never know (especially since I can't look out our peep-hole) so I pulled on some jeans real quick and answered the door. And there stood my mom and dad... I was speechless, motionless, thoughtless... I just stood there with my mouth wide open and finally was able to mutter "WHAT?...WHAT?...WHAT??" I was so happy and excited to see them, but I didn't quite believe it. So we had a wonderful weekend together, showing them around the beautiful sites of Seattle and having tons of laughs. But then Sunday morning rolled around; I had to take Andy to the airport super early so he could go to Las Vegas for a business trip (he was gone until Wednesday!!). And then Sunday night rolled around and I had to drop my parents off to fly back to Utah. It was a pretty sad car ride home, and sad night, and sad several nights after that...

So I had plenty of quiet time over the last few days to think irrational thoughts and feel sorry for myself. It's not like I'm depressed or anything, but I'm just kind of hoping that writing down my thoughts might help me get over it and DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.

Here are a few of my thoughts of why 24 sucks:

1) I'm 24 and a receptionist...REALLY?? Can't I have a better job where I am actually happy and doing something that I love? I'd be happier if I was at least an administrative assistant or something; something that I felt actually makes a difference to a company. But I am a receptionist (1 of 2 receptionists, might I add; so I'm not even THE receptionist). I could be gone for an entire week (maybe even a month) of work and it wouldn't matter... I would come back and have NOTHING to catch up on.
2) I'm 24 and still haven't decided what I would "love" to do career-wise...
3) I'm 24 and not a graduate from college...(this one leads back up to #2. If I knew what I wanted to do, then I would not have quit school. I would have finished and felt like I had accomplished something)
4) I'm 24 and I don't have a baby...and I just started my period today and that is probably (not probably, definitely!) T.H.E. worst thing in the world to happen to a woman who is ready for a baby N.O.W.!

Okay, now that I've written down all of my "woe-is-me" thoughts - What am I going to do about it? Oh, that's right, probably nothing! Because it's hard...and I don't even know where to start! How can I figure out #2? How can I afford #3? And how can I fix #1 without jeopardizing #4???

Help me!! Anyone out there have any advice for me? Anyone out there have irrational thoughts at birthday-time and then felt better as the year went on? Am I just crazy...?

24 least for now.


  1. 24 is still really young. It always helps me to think of what else could be happening or what I have compared to others close to my age.
    This is a blog of a friend from high school who is going through some hard hard times and seeing things like this always makes me appreciate my own trials.

  2. Wait til 25...
    Just kidding :)
    I had Lia right after I turned 24. It's sad to say, but pretty much all I thought of after she was born was how soon I could have another one. I mean, my mom had 4 kids by this age! I needed to do some serious catch up!
    So now I'm 25 with a 12 month old and another baby on the way in 4 months and I'm TERRIFIED. 2 babies under 2! It's going to be hard. I an excited to have another baby, but I keep thinking, what was my hurry? I could have waited and enjoyed my time with Lia a little longer. I am realizing now that I have a lot of time ahead of me still.
    So my advice to you is, relax :) You truly are still young! The things on your list will happen sometime, and you'll look back and wonder what all the rush was about.

  3. Oh dear, I'm so sorry for the hard week! It was a hard week for us here too. We should have known that we needed each other more! You're still young though dear. It's okay that you're on the path that you're on. You will have the babies that you want one day, and you will probably even appreciate them more. And hopefully you'll be able to stay home with the kiddos, and you will LOVE that job! You're doing what the Lord asks, what more can I say?

  4. Kell... I am so sorry that you had a bad week but you just made my night. haha. Debbie downer? I've never even thought of that! I don't remember if you know this but Debbie is my mother in law and can be a downer sometimes in my life. haha. This will be perfect! Sorry that you had a tough week though. I am sure that it will get better. You can't judge the whole year on one week. I have been having the same thought lately. I have a degree and can't even get a job so I don't know if #3 would help you at all, just a thought. I just have to look at the bigger picture when that happens and know that if I am trying that heavenly father will do the rest. I know that never helps when you are right in the middle of it but if you ever need a listening ear I am here for you! (or I guess in our case here to read and reply.)